WHEN THE UNTHINKABLE HAPPENS: WHO WILL CARE FOR YOUR CHILDREN?

August 10, 2026
Crystal M. Richardson

No parent wants to imagine a day when they can’t be there for their children.

Whether it’s a serious car accident, a sudden medical emergency, or an unexpected tragedy, most of us naturally believe those things happen to someone else. The truth is, life can change in an instant. While we can’t control the unexpected, we can prepare for it. One of the greatest gifts you can give your children is a clear legal plan that documents whom you would want to care for your children if you cannot.

What Is a Legal Guardianship Plan?

If you have minor children, planning for guardianship is an important part of your estate plan. It allows you to formally nominate the person you would want to care for your children if you are no longer able to do so.

In North Carolina, a parent may use a last will and testament to recommend a guardian for a minor child. This nomination does not automatically make that person your child’s legal guardian. A guardianship proceeding is still required, and the clerk of superior court ultimately makes the appointment based on the child’s best interests.

Your written nomination provides important guidance about whom you trust to care for your children and helps ensure your wishes are known as part of that process.

A Moment to Consider

It’s Friday evening. You and your spouse finally have the opportunity for a much-needed date night. The children are home with a trusted babysitter. On the drive home, you’re involved in a serious car accident.

As first responders provide emergency care, another important question arises:

Who has the legal authority to care for your children?

If you have not documented your wishes, there may be uncertainty about who should step in to care for your children until the court can make those decisions. Depending on the circumstances, family members, caregivers, law enforcement, and the court may all play a role in determining the safest temporary arrangement while the legal process moves forward.

This does not happen because anyone has done anything wrong. It happens because the State has a legal responsibility to protect children and ensure they are placed in a safe environment while legal authority is established.

By naming a guardian in your estate planning documents, you provide the court with clear guidance about your wishes and help reduce uncertainty during an already difficult time. While the court must still formally appoint a guardian, your written nomination can provide important direction throughout that process.

You Know Your Family Best

Choosing a guardian is about more than identifying someone who can provide a safe home. You know the relationships, values, and experiences that are important to your family.

You may want your children to remain close to siblings and extended family. You may consider where a potential guardian lives, their approach to parenting, the community your children would grow up in, or their ability to honor the cultural traditions and values that are important to your family.

These are deeply personal considerations that may not be apparent from legal documents or family relationships alone. Naming a guardian gives you an opportunity to thoughtfully consider these factors and make your preferences known.

Why Every Parent Should Have a Guardianship Plan

A thoughtfully prepared guardianship plan can:

Formally identify the person or people you want the court to consider as guardian for your minor children;
Provide the court with guidance about your wishes;
Help reduce confusion and conflict among family members;
Create greater stability for your children during an unexpected crisis; and
Give you peace of mind knowing you’ve planned ahead for the people who matter most.

How to Choose the Right Guardian

Choosing a guardian is one of the most meaningful decisions you’ll make as a parent.

As you consider your options, ask yourself:

Who has a close relationship with my children?
Who shares my parenting values?
Is this person willing and able to take on this responsibility?
Have I discussed this decision with them?

There is no perfect answer, and every family’s circumstances are unique. The most important step is having a thoughtful plan in place before it is ever needed.

Protect Your Family with a Plan

Emergencies don’t wait until we’re ready. Creating a legal guardianship plan isn’t about expecting the worst. It’s about ensuring your wishes are known and helping protect your children if the unexpected happens. Planning ahead today can provide your family with clarity and peace of mind tomorrow.